Thursday, March 23, 2017

How Do I Convince My Wife To Let Me Buy An Expensive Sword?:


Ah, the age old question.

I think women are genetically predisposed to objecting to sword purchases. There was a flaming sword that kept Eve out of the Garden of Paradise after they ate the forbidden fruit, so I am assuming that hatred for sharp shiny things comes from there.

But, I have actually been through this exact situation before.

And, I want to help you and all my brothers and sisters of the sword who have to go through the painstaking process of actually getting what they want at the price they are willing to pay.

Planning My Attack: 
To give you a little bit of background, my wife is a school teacher and says “no” to shithead teenagers all day. She also teaches “Argument for Public Speaking” to High Schoolers, so my task to try and convince her this is a necessary purchase is doubly difficult. 

But, I do have a pretty decent collection, so I must be doing something right, yeah? Maybe she is just nice. Yeah, we’ll go with that (hi, hun!)

What You Can Do:
There are several things you can do to get the sword you want; keeping in mind it is not a $5000 custom work (then you’re on your own).

1) If you have any additional sources of income (freelancing, second job, lotto tickets, etc) use those

2) Use birthdays, anniversaries, or other special occasions/accomplishments to justify

3) Promise you won’t buy one for an extended period of time (“If I get this one, I won’t buy another for a year.” It was 2 in my case. I have 4 months and 8 days left)

4) Sign up for a new credit card, buy the sword, pay off the CC in small amounts every month

5) Have an open and honest discussion with her (just make sure the bills are paid, first).

"Hun, I have done my research, and this is the best sword I will ever own. The bills are paid and more aren’t due until next month-ish and we have the money. This is something I am passionate about and I would like to be able to learn properly with the tools that are available to me on the market.”

If she doesn't respond to your hard work and reasoning, well then, she's like every other wife out there. Ha! But, you have to try.

6) Buy it and ask forgiveness with something nice for her that you NEVER do (get dressed up and take her out, flowers, day at the spa, etc.)

7) Talk about the consistent resale value of a high-priced sword like an Albion or Christian Fletcher. You can always put it back on the market and it should go quickly, due to the small sword community you are a part of.

8) Look on eBay and the SBG Sale Forums to find the sword at a lower price. You can always try and negotiate with the seller, let them know your situation, then show your wife the savings when you get it.

If none of these work, then use combinations, just beg (no, don't), or forget the purchase for now and revisit. LOL. Every marital situation is different, as is every wife. 

If you don’t know how to navigate her, should you really be married in the first place? Just kidding…or am I?

Bottom line: You have one shot at life. Buy the Albion. 

Good luck!